Zebu had a game last night,
the first in the end-of-season tournament.
I did not go.
I am so glad I did not go.
Zebu’s team won but the opposing team and opposing team’s "grown-ups"
apparently behaved atrociously.
Blatant fouls.
Poor sportsmanship.
Shouts and jeers.
Taunting.
Pounding hands and stomping feet during free throws.
Overall ass-hattery.
As Zebu, Wildebeest, and Zippy described the game,
I kept saying, "No way. They did not do that."
Especially in regards to the parents’ behavior.
I’m not sure why I’m sharing these details.
Maybe I’m hoping one of you has a magic remedy for dealing with this stuff
since Zebu plans to play basketball in high school,
and I’ll undoubtedly be faced with more of the same.
Have you encountered this during your kids’ sporting events?
If so, how do you cope?
Tracy Abell 
😦 I wouldn’t cope well, I don’t think. I hope you get some good suggestions here!
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It’s so, so hard. I try to always have a book and/or pages I can edit, but when someone’s yelling his fool head off, it’s hard to remain detached. From what I heard about last night, it’s unbelievable the refs didn’t speak to those parents.
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Not having kids and not being sporty, personally I have no real clue but have read about an awful lot of ass-hatery going on at kids’ soccer and hockey games over the past few years. I’ll feel like I’m about 80 if I say that too many people don’t know/aren’t interested in behaving respectfully to others anymore but that seems to be the case whether we’re talking about sports, shopping at the supermarket or what…
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You’re right, Carolyn. This kind of stuff extends beyond kids’ sports. But I find it extra infuriating when parents lose sight of the fact that it’s a game, a kids’ game, and that they’re only supposed to be there to support the kids. I’d like to make a huge Get a Life banner and wave it in their faces.
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I’ve seen it at soccer. One team (and its parents) were so bad, the soccer club contacted the league and refused to play them again.
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I’ve heard it can get really bad in soccer. I’m glad your league took action because we had some really bad situations this season.
But now it’s over. They lost their game last night so are out of the tournament.
(I’m thinking about you and your family).
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Sad to say they dealt with it when it involved an opposing team, but when they had teammates bullying each other they did nothing. That was the start of T-Boy’s problem. Same kid has been after him for a year now. Wish we’d never seen a soccer ball.
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Cleaning out my inbox and realized I left town without responding to this. I hope the situation has improved in the last week and that TBoy is feeling better. And you, too, of course.
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Wow. That is really unpleasant. D. has been in soccer and basketball for years, but always at the rec level, so we haven’t had to deal with that level of craziness. One thing they have here is forced attendance for a parent behavior meeting before we get to register the kids for their teams. Maybe that helps make people more aware of their behavior. Sorry you have to go through all that.
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We have to sign stuff that says we won’t act like idiots but I guess that’s a meaningless agreement. I’m glad D never dealt with that. It’s clear, though, that some parents are way too invested in their kids’ lives. Yikes.
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That’s awful! Ohhhh, other parents/teams make me boil, and I my son is only 6! I, if feeling brave, will make civil comments out loud so the offensive parents might hear. (like ‘hey this isn’t the flippin’ NBA’ or something like that) Usually I am just offended about how the coaches, which are always one of the parents, are treating their own players-the yelling, the facial expressions, the clear disappointment. It’s ridiculous, and makes it hard to enjoy the game and focus on your kid. Guess I’ll have to get used to it, or listen to my iPod while I watch!
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I do that, too, but it never makes a dent. It does make me feel a bit better to speak up, though. I guess I’ll just take that approach. And the earplugs idea is a good one!
I also know what you mean about the coaches; we’ve encountered that, too. It’s painful to witness those kids trying so hard for their dads.
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UGH! I’m sorry.
My oldest son had this happen back when he was in Little League. He was about 12 at the time. Our team played a couple of other teams with parents and player behaviour much as you describe. Some of our parents went over and said things, calmly but firmly, appealing to the other parents. And our coach would always have conversations with the other coach, trying to get the opposing team to use better sportsmanship. In Little League there’s a strict code of conduct that grownups are supposed to abide by, or risk having their team forfeit, but I don’t know if anyone really ever applies that.
In our case, I don’t remember our team’s appeals having much effect, but then we beat both the other teams, which was really SWEET.
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I always want my kid’s team to win but that’s about as far as it goes. Until he plays against one of those crazy communities and then I really, really want him to win. Zippy told me he was SO glad when Z’s team won the other night, and I knew exactly how he felt. Sweet!
I like the idea of the coach talking to the other coach, and I think that works. Except in the situation when the coach is also nuts (which we’ve witnessed). But I think the calm but firm approach is best; at the very least, I can know that I spoke up and tried to make things better.
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