The ins and outs of editorial voices

Every writer knows about the internal editor,
that yammering
whispering
haranguing
insidious
voice
that says
Your story sucks
Your writing sucks
You suck so why don’t you give it up already?

I utilize different strategies for getting past my internal editor,
but without a doubt
the most effective approach is to keep writing.
Head down, pen moving.
Guaranteed, that voice will eventually shut up.
At least for a while.

In my experience, the external editors are sometimes harder to ignore.

Marcel and Loki insert themselves into the process.

Marcel and Loki insert themselves into the process.

 

 

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To bee or not to bee

Last night we had a hail storm that stripped leaves from trees and petals from flowers. The yard and patio are a mess. I went out with my camera to assess the damage and was happy to find many busy bees.

Don't think I've seen this type of bee before. Many on flowers this morning.

Don’t think I’ve seen this type of bee before. Many of them were on the flowers in one bed this morning.

 

Bee with pollen

Meanwhile, in another bed, some bumblebees were hard at work. Note the pollen on back legs.

 

Didn't even know that bee was in frame until after the fact.

Didn’t even know this bee was in the frame until after the fact!

Earth is a flower and it’s pollinating.
~  Neil Young

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Endless series of little details

Wine glass

 

A mountain is composed of tiny grains of earth.
The ocean is made up of tiny drops of water.
Even so, life is but an endless series of little details, actions,
speeches, and thoughts.
And the consequences whether good or bad of even the least of them
are far-reaching.
 ~ Swami Sivananda

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Hooping friend

I’m not 100% positive, but am pretty sure this bunny
enjoys hooping and/or funky hooping music.
This guy/gal sat outside my picture window this morning,
watching and listening as I hoop-danced to
Aretha’s “Respect”
Aretha’s “Rock Steady”
Stevie’s “Higher Ground”
and more.

Bunny enlarged

Know what this means?

I’ve got a new hooping buddy who happens to be a bunny
which makes him/her my hooping bunny buddy.

Try saying that three times real fast.

Hooping bunny buddy
Hooping bunny buddy
Hooping bunny buddy

 

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It saves going to heaven

I’m posting this Cliff Swallow photograph from over a year ago because birds always, always make me feel better. 
Cliff Swallow enlarged

I hope you love birds too. It is economical. It saves going to heaven.
 ~ Emily Dickinson

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Wrote some blues

Woke up this morning feeling low,
nothing specific driving my blues.
More like a muffled blanket of sad
wrapped around me.

I forced myself out of bed for:
stretching
yoga
hooping.

Slightly better
but still wanted
to crawl back under the covers.

Grabbed some coffee and breakfast
along with my YA project notebook and pages.
Got to work.

Slightly better
but still blue around the edges.
Trying to use it to my advantage.

Grape hyacinth

I merely took the energy it takes to pout and wrote some blues.
~   Duke Ellington

On becoming numb and desensitized

I just saw this tweet:
adam johnson iraq tweet

I responded with this:

And now I can’t stop thinking about how for years and years I maintained an Iraq death toll sign in my front yard. Every day I looked up the death tolls for Iraqi civilians and U.S. troops, and changed the numbers on the sign. The sign Zippy and I kept chained to our locust tree after other versions were stolen. The sign that resulted in vandalism and harrassment from people in our neighborhood. The sign that was my voice after my elected “representatives” refused to listen to me and the millions of people around the globe who took to the streets to demand the United States NOT invade Iraq in 2003.

Death toll numbers as of August 8, 2014

Death toll numbers as of August 8, 2014

That photo is from a post on August 8, 2014, when Obama started bombing Iraq some more. I never put it out again despite the ongoing, never-ending death and destruction following the U.S. led invasion and occupation of Iraq.

Which brings me back to Adam H. Johnson’s tweet and my shame.

The corporate elites and imperialists count on us to be apathetic due to overwhelm, but it’s on me that I’ve let the people of Iraq slip off my emotional radar. Just as it’s on me that I’ve pretty much become numb and desensitized to every single instance of death and destruction. I don’t want to feel numb and desensitized, I really don’t. I’d rather be angry and in the streets with a pitchfork.

But everything feels like too fucking much.

 

 

Hot fun in the summertime

Today is gonna be hot.
Red Hot Poker hot.

These beauties grow next to my driveway after former neighbors committed one of their "drive by plantings."

These beauties grow next to my driveway after former neighbors committed one of their “drive by plantings.”

While I do admire the Red Hot Pokers’ fiery colors,
I find these Purple Coneflowers more soothing:
Purple Coneflowers

After taking those photos, I spent a fair amount of time
chasing bumblebees around the lavender with my camera.
Unfortunately, I didn’t get anything worth sharing.
The good news is that I always, always have bees in my yard
so I’ll have plenty of chances to capture one of those bumbly bees.

In the meanwhile, I’ll kick back to a little Sly & the Family Stone:

Stay cool, people.

 

 

 

Adopting the Mandela and Roseannadanna perspective

IMG_9957

After climbing a great hill, one only finds that there are many more hills to climb.         ~ Nelson Mandela

Or, in the words of another great humanitarian:
“Well, Jane, it just goes to show you, it’s always something — if it ain’t one thing, it’s another.”  ~ Roseanne Roseannadanna

Ain’t that the truth.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Some days I want to cover my eyes

“There cannot be enduring peace, prosperity, equality and brotherhood in this world if our aims are so separate and divergent, if we do not accept that in the end we are people, all alike, sharing the Earth among ourselves and also with other sentient beings, all of whom have an equal role and stake in the state of this planet and its players.”
~  Jigme Khesar Namgyel Wangchuck 

Double-blooming clematis from my garden.

Double-blooming clematis from my garden.

Not Everyone Enjoys Loud Noises

Happy Independence Day.
Whoop. Whoop.

This time of year is trauma-inducing for many dogs (including my own) because of the exploding fireworks. It’d be one thing if the fireworks only happened on July 4th. But people in my neighborhood have been shooting off stuff for the last several nights and will continue to do so throughout the week.

Zoey is a nervous wreck.
Zoey on deck

It’s hard witnessing your dog cram herself beneath your bedside table and then shiver in fear. There’s no way to get her to understand some humans’ need for loud noises and flashing colors. If I don’t grasp the concept, she’s not gonna get it, either.

I realize I’m not going to change anyone’s mind about all this. (The other night I waited for a lull in the explosions and then yelled out my window: “It’s July 2nd, people!” A few seconds later, the fireworks recommenced). However, I want to note that there’s another way to exhibit July patriotism. Go to MuckRock and file a Freedom of Information Act (FOIA) request to help make our government transparent. Today is the 50th anniversary of the Freedom of Information Act, and that’s definitely something worth celebrating in a non-exploding way!

That Smell

Ooh, that smell
Can’t you smell that smell?
Ooh, that smell
The smell of death surrounds you, yeah

Thank you, Lynyrd Skynyrd, for penning today’s theme song. Allow me to explain.

Last fall while researching Build a Compost Tumbler, I learned all sorts of good stuff that helped me reinvigorate our composting process here at home. In fact, to Zippy’s absolute delight, we now have three compost bins (one free-standing and two tumblers). And one of the biggest changes to our composting method is that we no longer put weeds in our trash where they end up creating methane and carbon dioxide in the landfill.

Unwelcome plant aka WEED.

Unwelcome plant aka WEED.

The prickly lettuce, the bindweed, the thistles, the grasses gone to seed, all those things go into a lidded garbage can full of water.

You see, I learned from Bob Flowerdew** that weed seeds and roots will die if left submerged in water for two weeks. (Weeds are valuable compost materials that are often left out because of the fear that the invasive weeds will spread via the compost.)  But you know what else happens after those two weeks of submersion? The water is transformed into one of Mr. Flowerdew’s favorite things: vile liquids. He loves them because vile liquids are great additives to your composting piles. Vile liquids accelerate the composting process.

Early stages of the tumbler Zippy and I built before I wrote the book.

Early stages of the tumbler Zippy and I built before I wrote the book.

But if left too long, vile liquids will, oddly enough, give off the aroma you’d expect from a vile liquid. (Think farmyard plus death plus your next three least favorite smells). It’s imperative you wear old clothes and shoes while handling vile liquids, especially when you’ve allowed your weeds to marinate for a month or longer. (Oops.) And woe to you if you happen to splash any on exposed skin.

Ooh, that smell

So yes, I did handle vile liquids today. And yes, despite the latex gloves (you want one-use gloves for this chore), I got vile liquids on my hand and now all I can smell is that horrifying combination of stink. (The stink does go away, just never fast enough).

Lynyrd Skynyrd is playing on a loop in my head as I try my best to think ahead to the rich compost I’ll someday be adding back into the earth.
Spring garden shots 018

**best compost-guru name ever!

Friday Five: The Marcel Edition

  1. This is Marcel.
    Marcel jpeg
    He looks like the typical cat who sleeps 18 hours per day, right?
  2. I will admit he sleeps a fair amount. In fact, he’s napping downstairs as I write this. But I’ve never lived with a cat who was better at entertaining himself. Marcel especially loves elastics, twist ties, and pipe cleaners (also my sweaty socks, but that’s a whole other blog post).
  3. The other morning as I did yoga, Marcel showed up with a purple pipe cleaner. I tried to maintain my yogic** concentration as he batted it around then snuck up on it to pounce. A few minutes later, Marcel showed up with a white pipe cleaner. After that, it was a black pipe cleaner.
    Pipe cleaners

    The white pipe cleaner is MIA, but these two remain on the floor as toys.

    If you look closely you can see Marcel’s white hairs on the pipe cleaners, (and if you have really good vision, the kind that sees across the miles and through walls, you’d see white hairs on my shirts, shoes, futons, hardwood floors, bathroom vanity, . . .)

  4. That third pipe cleaner prompted me to investigate and, sure enough, I found the source. Marcel had gone down to the drawers that Wildebeest and Zebu used way back when for storing their craft items. Marcel had opened the drawer holding the pipe cleaners.
    Craft drawer
  5. Marcel is a nappy cat, a food-obsessed cat, and also a pretty damned smart cat.

    Marcel woke up when I came down to photograph the scene of the crime.

    Marcel woke up when I came down to photograph the scene of the crime.

**Confession: I thought I’d made up a word but then looked it up and discovered I was inadvertently legit.

A Meditation on Orange

Good thing I’m not planning on getting sent to prison
because if it’s true that Orange Is the New Black,
I’m in serious fashion trouble;
I look great in black and pretty close to dead in orange.
(I appear equally deadish in tan/beige which is what the inmates on the
show wear after they’ve been fully processsed into the system.)

I’m several episodes into Season 4 and am enjoying it more than
Season 3 which I thought was awful in a lot of ways.
I’ve come to the conclusion that Piper is best as a seasoning,
rather than an entree.
Most every other character is more compelling.
In fact, I can’t think of one who isn’t.

Come to think of it, maybe that’s the point.

Either way, I’m going to watch the rest of the season
and be grateful I can choose what I wear each day.
Because not all of us wear our orange as well as these poppies.

Happy poppies one day in May.

Happy poppies one day in May.

 

 

Friday Five: The Iris Edition

Just took a little tour of my front and back gardens. Last year I lost almost all iris blooms to a snowstorm so am thrilled at this year’s turnout. There are several stands of iris not yet in bloom, but these beauties are currently going all out:

Burgandy Iris

Brown Iris

Purple Iris

Cream Iris

This is one of my pure white iris planted next to several deep, deep purple iris, and I’m looking forward to that dramatic display:

White Iris closed

Wishing everyone a beautiful, blooming weekend!

Still Here: A Story of Daffodils and Me

In the fall of 2006, I was a mentee at the Rutgers One-On-One Conference where Laurie Halse Anderson was the keynote speaker. In addition to offering smart and funny insights into her writing journey, she offered us daffodil bulbs. True story.

Last Friday, I took this photo of my LHA flowers that keep on blooming, year after year:
Daffodils

The next day, it started snowing. And over the next twenty-four hours, more than two feet of snow fell on those daffodils.

Me several feet away from buried daffodils.

Me several feet away from the buried daffodils.

If I’d been thinking, I would’ve covered the flowers with a bucket to protect them from the elements. Alas, I didn’t think that far ahead. So now they’re beneath the rapidly melting snow where they may or may not recover from the shock of an April blizzard in Colorado.

I share a kinship with those flowers that goes beyond them symbolizing my connection to the children’s writing community. The daffodils and I have been on a nine-year journey together. Every year they push through the soil to face whatever comes their way, not knowing whether they’ll be greeted with sunshine or flurries. And every year I continue writing my stories, not knowing whether they’ll be greeted with warmth or snowy rejection.

It’s a risky business for those flowers and me, but we keep on doing what we need to do. And year after year, we prevail.
Prevail bracelet 010