Prevail

         

Yesterday I suffered a massive blow to my quest for publication.
I’m still reeling from it all and trying to process
what it means for me in the long-term.

More than once the thought has entered my mind that I should give up,
cry "Uncle!"
Take up something new.

But as I sat on my patio this morning,
in a stunned kind of mourning,
I saw an ant dragging an equally large ant across the paver stones.

WARNING:  Avert your gaze if you do not like ants!

                                                                          © 2010 Tracy Abell

Then the ant started up the vertical wall of my step,
and my first thought was, "Wow.  That’s some strength."
My second thought was, "Hey, if a tiny ant can summon all that inner fortitude, so can I."

So, while I’m still feeling shaky and unsure,
I’m also feeling that glimmer of resolve that’s carried me this far.
I’m counting on The Mighty Ant to remind me of my capabilities.

I will prevail.
              

50 thoughts on “Prevail

  1. of course you will PREVAIL!! You are so much mightier than that little ant!!

    “No matter how impossible everything may seem, never underestimate the power of a dream.”

    P O W E R!!!!!!!!

  2. Oof, it must have been some blow! I’m so sorry. but as the official self-assigned Tracy World egg basket holder, I know you’ll prevail. And good for you for recognizing yourself as the red ant and not the other one.

  3. Crap, Tracy. I’m sorry something bad happened. Email me if you want to talk it over. dot crane g mail

    Also, I don’t know if you saw it, but I have some good news, which I mention because you know how much I’ve been through, so if me hanging in there can lead to good news, it can for you as well.

  4. Oh, Crap! Sorry about that first comment, I was making a joke about the ant before I read the entire post. Dang it!

    I don’t know what happened to you, but I KNOW you can move beyond it… might take a little time, but you, of all the bloggers I know, are pretty amazing!

    If there’s anything I can do to help, say the word!

    • Thanks so much, Brian, for the kind words. I’m hanging in there and that’s in large part due to this amazing community. I appreciate your support.

  5. Embrace

    The choice for growth: to Prevail.
    In the end, you write because you love to write.
    You are doing what you love.
    Lucky girl.
    Everything else is ego.
    Celebrate the shaky feeling.
    You are another step toward
    ego letting go.

  6. OH Tracy, first off, big hugs. (I first typed bug hugs…haha)

    I’m so sorry you got dealt such a blow but you get major gold stars in my book for turning your mind around so quickly. Here’s to better days ahead.

    • I accept all hugs, even bug hugs. πŸ™‚

      I did turn my mind around pretty quickly but it’s made a few turns since then. Mostly, I’m looking forward to better days ahead. And I really appreciate you being here for me as I figure it out. Thank you, Susan.

  7. You are such a strong woman, Tracy, and I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that you will most certainly PREVAIL.

    You already have.

    And you will again.

    Because you are the inimitable, indominable YOU.

    xoxo

    • Ah, Melodye. How can I give up when I have a friend such as you cheering me along? Your faith if me renews my own faith. Gosh darn it, I will Prevail!

  8. (((((((Tracy))))))

    Obviously I have no idea what the blow was. If if came from a critiquer, it is one person. If it came from an agent, it is one person. I believe Walt Disney’s art teacher told him he would never suceed. Ha! We can’t let nay sayers stand in our way. Of course this might not even be related to the issue. But if it is, push forward. Even if it is somethign else, push forward. The only difference between the published writer and the unpublished writer is one persevered. Be the ant. Be the ant.

    • I am the ant. I am the ant. (Not to be confused with “I am the walrus. I am the walrus.”…and this will only be funny to you if you’ve seen The Big Lebowski). But you are right, Tracy, about the perseverance. I am mighty and I will push on.

      Thanks so much for the support, Tracy. It’s helping me get through.

  9. I’m so sorry to hear about the blow, Tracy. This path can be so hard. But keep the faith. You’re so close right now.

  10. I hope the inner strength the ants gave you helps turn things around. You’ve given me an extra shot of fortitude right when I needed it.

    • I’m so glad my post and the ant gave you that extra shot of fortitude! Whatever you’re facing right now, know I’m sending my support and faith your way. You can do it! We can do it!

  11. *sings* “Just what makes that little old ant/think he can move that rubber-tree plant?/Everyone knows an ant, can’t, move a rubber-tree plant”

    Keep up your high hopes. And remember that one no doesn’t mean a damn thing, no matter whom it comes from. Seriously.

    • She’s singing to me! My favorite poet singing just for me! This made me smile. Thank you, Kelly, for the song and reminder that one No does not signal the end of anything.

  12. Oh, Tracy. I am so sorry. This is a hard, hard business — so much harder than anyone outside of it realizes. But I believe in you and your writing. Hold onto that glimmer!

    • You’re so right, Amy, about people outside not really grasping the difficulty. My kids feel bad for my hurt but the whole thing baffles them, I think. Baffles me, for that matter.

      With your help, I will hold onto the glimmer. Thank you so much.

    • You’re a hard worker putting her heart and soul into the process, and I’m going to keep doing the same. Thank you, Sarah. Maybe you could go wander a castle for me….:)

  13. Sorry I’m late to the prevail party, but I wanted to chime in with everyone else and say YES. It’s a tough industry, a tough craft, a tough dream to carry… and luckily you too are tough. All of us in this community–on this path–know what the heart-stopping drops, twists, and whiplash turns feel like. We need each other. You’re inspiring me to reach out more too, because goodness knows I need to.

    • Thanks so much for coming back to read this, Phoebe. You’re right about the tough aspect of all this, and how we need each other. This community has kept me going the past few days (and in other dark times). I’m here for you, too. Remember that.

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